Beauty Handicap!
The Pepperpot Magazine ran from 1915 to 1975 and was presented as a “magazine depicting mainly the personal and lighter side of Jamaican life”. Throughout its run, it published poems, short stories, articles, social commentary and illustrations. This short story, "Beauty Handicap!" by H.G. Shuttle Cock, was published in Vol 11. No. 7 in the 1967 issue of Pepperpot and explores themes of colourism and texturism in 1960s Jamaican society. “On this auspicious occasion of the 15th anniversary of the Change-in-the Weather Literary, Social and Debating Society, it is imperative, if Councillor Sunderland approves, that we mark this memorable milestone in our history. I therefore propose. if Councillor Sunderland approves, that we have a Beauty Contest to so commemorate the occasion" …
Extracts from Teacher Cummings presidential address to the annual meeting of the C-in-the WLSDS. The proposal of a beauty contest was profound. Not a single member said a single word in opposition and Councillor Sunderland approved. Everybody wanted a beauty contest.
A sub-committee, with Councillor Sunderland's approval, was appointed to work with Tailor Higgins in selecting titles for the beauties, The first title arrived at of course was "Miss Higgins Merchant Tailor Shop"
In due course, and with Councillor Sunderland's approval, such titles as "Miss Johnson Butcher Shop" "Miss Icy Dressmaking Parlour (girls taught") "Miss Simmonds Bar", "Miss Postal Agency", "Miss Skittles Played Here" and "Miss Rose Bud Guest House" emerged.
All the places of business in Change-in-the-Weather, except Mr. Harrison's Grocery, were thus represented. Councillor Sunderland did not approve "Miss Harrison Grocery" because Mr. Harrison had campaigned against his election.
On observing the list. Councillor Sunderland was duly pleased. In fact, his pleasure lured him into such expansiveness that he directed that the contest should be non-partisan.
“We want this to be a beauty contest for all the people of Change-in-the-Weather, whatever party they belong to, he proclaimed. In fact, it is my intention to invite my fellow Councillor over at Burn and Brush to send a girl from over there to enter our contest, even though he does not belong to my Party”
In due course, the seven most likely girls from Change-in-the-Weather were selected to wear the sashes. One of the immediate problems was to accommodate the titles in the space available on the contestants from hemline to shoulder.
This was overcome however, by running the sashes around to the back. so that the last word appeared, not in front, but on the backs of the girls. This arrangement had some advantage, in that their backs were as eloquent as their fronts.
In addition to the seven contestants from Change-in-the Weather, there duly arrived the contestant from Burn and Brush, who wore the unoriginal title of “Misy Burn and Brush", She was a pretty girl, but, in the eyes of the villagers, she had one disadvantage — she was "too dark" and she had "bad hair".
Having declared that the contest would be conducted on democratic lines, Councillor Sunderland even allowed the organizers of the contest to appoint their own judges. The result was that several people of known impartiality were asked to officiate.
Butcher Johnson who had been fortunate enough to get his own daughter to wear his sash as "Miss Johnson Butcher Shop" approached the Councillor and expressed his desire that his daughter should be "favourably considered". He reminded the Councillor of the amount of money he had expended in furtherance of the Councillor's cause in the last election.
The Councillor was duly mindful. He remembered the occasions when he had to approach the butcher to "lend" him something to pursue his campaign and he remembered how willingly the butcher complied. There was a snag however. The people of the village had always prided themselves in the "nice brown-skinned girls" that came from Change-in-the-Weather and the Butcher's daughter was distinctly dark of skin.
The Councillor was not happy at the thought of, first, presenting his own people with a beauty queen of so dark a complexion and secondly, he felt it would be a lost cause to send her forward to the Parish finals which was the ultimate goal.
Yet, he could not refuse his supporter's request without damaging a friendship that had been long and profitable to him.
"l tell you what brother," he whispered to the Butcher, "I give my word that this is a fair contest and I cannot take it back now. But I will have a word with Teacher Cummings and see what we can do."
"But Councillor, is not the first time you give yu word and tek it back," the Butcher retorted.
"That is not fair brother Johnson. That is only politics. When I give my word in politics I am a politician and don't have to keep my word. But when I give my word in this business, is a different matter".
“'I know that Teacher Cummings have to hear your word or im job don't worth jill because you is chairman of the school board, but you go and get dem other people — say you being impartial — an I not sure that you can convince them because some a dem not under your rule", the Butcher remonstrated.
"Leave it to me brother" the Councillor said. He was not sure what he would do, but the discussion was getting decidely embarrassing.
So, Councillor had to see Teacher. That was definite. But what he would say to Teacher was not clear to Councillor. He had committed himself to a fair contest and this was the mandate he had given to Teacher before Butcher Johnson threw his spanner into the works.
Fortunately , his conscience coaxed, he had not made any definite promise that “Miss Johnson Butcher Shop" would win the contest. He had promised however, that he would do something about the Butcher's demand, so he would see Teacher and make his wishes known in a guarded sort of way.
"Teacher my friend", he said as he approached the chairman of the beauty contest, “I have a request to make. I want you to conduct this beauty contest in a fair and impartial and non-partisan way. As chairman of the school board, I think that Butcher Johnson's daughter should have a good chance".
Teacher was decidedly surprised. He had on many occasions bowed to the wishes of Councillor against his better judgment, because Councillor was chairman of the school board, but Councillor had given a clear mandate that the contest should be fair and impartial.
"But Councillor", he said, "It is not me alone and the other judges going to vote as they feel like. Most of them from outside and I can't force them to vote my way."
"I know that Teacher, but I think it is time that we take pride in our people and pick a black girl. Tell them that. Tell them that it is time we take pride in our race. Tell them that we must stop being ashamed of the colour of our skin and give our race a chance".
Teacher inwardly reminded himself that Councillor had gone to St. Elizabeth to select a no-teeth white woman for his own wife. So how come now this sudden pride in "his" people?
It would be indiscreet to speak his thoughts. He knew that Councillor's wish was his command. Teacher knew also, that he could not approach the other judges with a straight proposal to bring in a certain candidate but perhaps if he tried indirect persuasion he might influence their decision.
When the seven judges met in the schoolroom to select the winner, Teacher made an impassioned speech about honouring “our race" and showing to the best of Jamaica that "we in Change-in-the-Weather are not afraid to project the image of our forefathers and honour a black girl as our beauty queen".
Teacher could tell by the looks that passed between the judges that his point was well taken. He conveyed word to the Councellor that he had been able to influence the other judges and everything was “under control."
As each judge placed his ballot into the hat which substituted for a ballot box, he looked at Teacher and nodded agreeably. Teacher in turned looked at Councillor and relayed each nod. There was an air of jubilant expectation in the area where Councillor and Butcher held sway over a small group of citizens, while Teacher began to unfold the bits of paper on which the votes were written.
But the broad smile on the Teacher’s face narrowed as each ballot fell from his hand to the table. Finally, head hung low, his eyes straying everywhere but in the direction of the Councillor's, he announced the result.
"Miss Burn and Brush" had won by a margin of six votes to one.